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The Monsters Within: An Original Story *Chapter Three Posted*

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Author Topic: The Monsters Within: An Original Story *Chapter Three Posted*  (Read 444 times)
Makastar
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« Reply #15 on: April 21, 2011, 04:08:44 pm »

Thanks Silver, and considering it took me almost a year to post a new chapter in Misfit Players before...you guys are off pretty lucky with only being behind a couple months.

Again, I can't stress enough the fact that readers should be considerate of the writer's situation. I have mentioned in my other writing threads about my situation in school and stuff. I should not have to repeat myself when its the same people asking for updates.
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« Reply #16 on: April 21, 2011, 06:14:27 pm »

I know the feeling. I can't get to lots of stuff at times because of school. It happens to us all at a time.
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« Reply #17 on: April 21, 2011, 10:30:15 pm »

Alright, alright, sorry I was so impatient. I'll admit that I feel that way sometimes too, trying to put everything into one day. I am sorry I well, rushed u. Yays, forgiveness! Tongue
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« Reply #18 on: April 22, 2011, 09:37:54 am »

I'm sure she forgives you. She's always forgiving like that.
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« Reply #19 on: May 10, 2011, 07:06:29 am »

AN: Mmk, sorry its taken me so long to actually post up these new things for you guys. I have been SUPER BUSY and unfortunately, posting new chapters and such for you guys was not my priority. But I'm back and working on a bunch of new things for you readers. Hope you enjoy! Remember, NO FLAMES and constructive criticism is welcome Smiley

*~Chapter One~*

The roars from the downstairs were like ones from creatures battling it out for a scrap of meat to chew on. Josh let that thought linger in his mind, approving of that more so than his parents just being in another blazing argument about god knows what. His dirty blond hair was unruly and grown over his teal eyes, though it didn’t stop the boy from lying down to read another novel from his collection he received from his various family members on Christmas. It was a little dull to his tastes but that leather-bound literature was his saving grace from the reality of the world he lived in right then. He would suffer through nails on a chalk board if that would lead him into the world of creativity and away from the bickering parents below.

The screams from downstairs were a common occurrence within the household, the Hill family suffering from harsh times and the unsettling feeling of unhappiness between the parents. There was once a time when Karleigh and Louis Hill were happy and in love, spending time together and raising their young son in harmony. However, they were soon dealt a lousy hand and Louis was then forced out of his job and into unemployment, leaving Karleigh to fend for the family while Louis drank his depression away. Thus began the symphonies of shouts between the two parents, leaving Josh on the sidelines to keep himself out of their spews of hatred and anger.

Reality was not kind to the boy, so he sought out a means of escape from the harsh and cruel world he was truly apart of and found that he could lose himself in his own imagination. In his mind, Josh Hill was surrounded by adventure and treasures beyond his wildest dreams. He could battle pirates, hunt for buried treasure, rescue damsels and even take on the occasional dragon or monster. Josh could break away from the real world and begin his journeys through make-believe, locking away the darkness that had begun to sprout in his heart from the reality surrounding him.

“And another thing…!” Karleigh’s voice broke into Josh’s thoughts again as the boy shook his head, trying to drown out the shouts with his reading of the book in his hands.

“There was nothing left for the boy but to follow his master’s orders and go on the journey to find the lost princess. But in order to find that princess, he had to brave the army of creatures that threatened his very existence. And by facing them, he risked becoming one in the same,” Josh paused a moment as he repeated that passage. “Risk becoming a monster to save some girl? Heh, not a chance. I wouldn’t risk myself for anyone. They can get out of their own messes. This boy is crazy!”

Josh bit his lip and let his book rest on the bed, a loud slam of a door reverberating off the walls. Karleigh and Louis both charged out of the home, the husband hopping into his pick-up and the wife sliding into her compact. The two of them drove off without so much as one acknowledgement of each other, or of the son that they left behind to go either explore the bars downtown or visit with friends to complain about the situation.

Lucky for them Josh was thirteen now and had learned from experience how to take care of himself on evenings like this. Brushing his blond bangs from his face, the boy stood up from his bed and traveled downstairs to lock the doors for the night and turn off the unnecessary lights. Then, after one quick round about the house, Josh headed back upstairs and drew a bath where he soaked and continued to dream about his adventures within his mind.

*~*~*~*~*

Wrapped up in comfortable pajamas and his Spiderman throw, Josh cuddled up with his leather-bound gateway and began to read the ink spilled on the pages of the book. It was the tale of a young boy who took his master’s words and ventured out to save a lost princess from a band of monsters; their home turning anyone who lingers there into a monster themselves. The more Josh thought over the story, excitement grew within him as he began to turn the pages one after the other.

He could see himself as the young boy, himself stepping through the rough terrains into the monsters’ world and braving his own demons to save a girl he had only dreamed of meeting. As the story went on, there were many obstacles the boy had to face including the king of the monsters, who used his magic to put a spell over the boy. The longer he stayed amongst the monsters, the more he began to change into one. The boy became scared of his outward appearance and felt the princess would never come with him if she saw him, thus his darkness began to emerge from the depths of his heart. However, the boy was not going to give up so easily as that. He fought against his darkness and the king and made himself known to the princess, the young girl looking past his looks and following the kind boy who had risked life and limb to save her from the world.

“Lucky it was the princess I was after instead of some normal girl because they wouldn’t have given me a second look,” Josh paused as he realized his mistake. “I mean, the boy was lucky…”

Josh glanced at the clock, placing the leather-bound on the sheets as he curled up more under his blanket. The clock read 3:30 am; he had been reading for six straight hours. The boy grumbled to himself before sliding off the edge of his bed and retrieving his slippers, stepping cautiously out of his room to check on his parents. They were still not home, though Josh was not surprised with this. This was the norm of his household after all, it would have been shocking if the night ended in pleasant conversation and a nice family gathering.

Josh rolled his teal orbs before scampering back up the stairs and into his room, pausing a moment as he stared at his bed. The book he clearly remembered placing down on the sheets was gone, vanished from the room altogether.

“Did it slide off the bed?” Josh questioned as he inched forward, glancing around the bed before gulping. “Maybe under the bed?”

Josh swallowed his hesitation and got down on his hands and knees, searching around the shadows under his bed for the book. Dust bunnies and old board games; not a book in sight. The boy grumbled as he began to stand up, feeling as if his mind were playing tricks on him for all his dreaming he had done.

“Looking for this?”

Josh let out a cry of shock as he jumped at the voice, his eyes searching through the dark as grotesque claws reached out from the shadows of his room and latched onto his body. The boy could see various pairs of red eyes glaring at him from around the room, growls bellowing up from the darkness as the claws pulled him backwards.

“Lemme go! I’m dreaming! Wake up!” Josh shouted out as he kicked and screamed, trying his best to break away from his little world of make-believe and return to the reality of his life with his parents. They might have been miserable and depressed from their actions but they were a thousand times better company than whatever these things were. “Come on, I need to wake up! I need to wake up!”

“There’s no waking up from that which is not a dream, boy,” the voice grumbled in the boy’s ear, a shiver running up Josh’s spine at the sound. “Take him to our lands, men. This boy is the one we’ve been waiting for.”

Josh’s teal eyes widened as he continued to kick and scream, though his actions did not good against the strength of the claws. Within moments, Josh was pulled back into complete darkness, himself soon completely gone from consciousness.

*End Chapter One*
« Last Edit: May 10, 2011, 07:09:28 am by Makastar » Report Spam   Logged

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« Reply #20 on: May 10, 2011, 03:12:59 pm »

Wow that was deep. Worth the wait.
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« Reply #21 on: May 10, 2011, 08:16:38 pm »

Wo. How dramatic.
Quote
drank his depression away
I rofled at that.

Constructive criticism: I suggest you use similes. Just a thought.
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« Reply #22 on: May 10, 2011, 08:34:21 pm »

Constructive criticism: I suggest you use similes. Just a thought.

I do though? Give more examples when you give constructive criticism.
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« Reply #23 on: May 10, 2011, 09:03:00 pm »

Well I must not be spotting any out. Hm. Might just be me. Cuz all of you know I have a low attention spa- oops my toasted ice cream is ready!
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« Reply #24 on: May 10, 2011, 09:58:46 pm »

Um ok I guess? Anyway, thanks for reading.
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« Reply #25 on: May 11, 2011, 03:32:23 pm »

Parts of it reminded me of Kingdom Hearts. The parts where it spoke of Darkness in Someone's heart. And the shadow creatures reminded me of Heartless. But, still a awesome story.
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« Reply #26 on: May 11, 2011, 03:58:01 pm »

Good connection.
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« Reply #27 on: May 11, 2011, 06:33:27 pm »

Thank you.
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« Reply #28 on: May 11, 2011, 08:14:31 pm »

Well, its not based off that if that's what you're saying?
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« Reply #29 on: May 11, 2011, 08:17:04 pm »

I'm fully aware it's not from KH. I'm just saying that parts of it reminded me of KH.
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